Recently I came upon my youngest, Oliver, playing a game of Klask by himself. (If you’re unfamiliar with Klask, think of it as a small air hockey or fuse ball table.) There he was, sitting on the side of the game table, with one hand playing each side.
“Look, Mom!” he called out. “I’m playing against myself, and the Me that I want to win is winning!”
I laughed and thought, Of course you are! Your little hands are in control, and you can swing the points to any side you choose. Then I was brought up short by my own thought.
Since I started this ministry back in 2011, I know that I’ve been doing social media all wrong.
I made a “business page” on Facebook because I heard that you weren’t supposed to use a personal page for a sole proprietor business (or ministry, in this case). Wrong! I eventually had to make a personal page just so I could use the existing business page, which is confusing to some who want to “friend” me.
And I post the “wrong” things on Facebook, including doing a terrible job of sharing other people’s stuff. In fact, according to social media folks, I do a terrible job of sharing my own stuff. I absolutely know they’re right.
I love organizing, and I love Jesus even more. But I hope that you don’t read any of my stuff and think, Well, Little Miss Organized certainly has it all together.
I really don’t have it all together. In all of my writing and speaking, I try to be super transparent, letting you know that I struggle with intentionally living for Christ just as much as the next person, if not more. I need His grace.
After reading Job 8, I decided to do an object lesson with my kids. (Fellow moms, grandmas, Sunday School teachers, try this one out this Halloween! You can make every holiday—even Halloween—about Jesus!)
I will not fear though tens of thousands assail me on every side.
Think it through
So you know I’ve struggled with anxiety, right? The regular kind, and the clinical kind?
That was meant as a joke. If you’ve read any of my stuff, then you’ve figured that one out. And during the course of each of my talks, I share that I’ve suffered with clinical anxiety and that it was the catalyst for this ministry and the whole idea of spiritual clutter. I generally only talk about it for five minutes or so—and I do it in a way that ties in directly with the specific talk topic, so it’s a little different each time—but I always share.
Recently, a MOPS group coordinator who was in the process of booking me as a speaker for the fourth year in a row (bless her heart!), asked me,
I will obey your decrees; do not utterly forsake me.
Think it through
So now that we’re reading and loving the law, it’s time to actually do what it says.
I’ve written posts on obeying God’s laws before (this one springs to mind), and I mean what I write! So why, like Paul, do I clutter my own spirit with disobedience? Why do I do what I don’t want to do?
There are many answers to that question, but the one I want to focus on today is this: sometimes I’m not set up for it. I haven’t made decisions before go-time is upon me, and I’m making a (bad) decision in the moment.
I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.
I will consider all your works and meditate on all your mighty deeds.
Think it through
This morning, I lost one of my kids again.
If you have kids, you know this feeling. You call out a name, but the only sound you hear is the hum of the refrigerator. You start walking from room to room, still calling for them, then you’re jogging, checking out closets and the basement. The house feels empty; your heart fills fear.
Today I want to share with you these words that I wrote a couple of months ago with a really heavy heart. I wasn’t sure I was going to post it… it’s a little longer than my normal post, a story within a story, but I think the end is worth it. Already Jesus is healing my soul, and I feel better than I did when I wrote this. But I’m still asking for the song…
One of my dreams died today. Not with a big bang, but with the small “Pfhut” of a candle being blown out by a soft breath. My spirit is cluttered with disappointment and heartache.
But before I get into that, let me tell you a cute little story. (I always try to be positive.)
I like to entertain Oliver while I do boring things, like wipe the kitchen counters or run errands with him, by singing. Now that he’s reached the wise old age of 6, he’s becoming less than enthused about this. Recently I decided to impress him by singing one of his favorite songs with a lot of gusto, really belting it out and hamming it up as he ate his lunch and I folded laundry on our kitchen table.
I hate to admit it, but I’m a bigger fan of historical fiction than I am of actual history books. I love to read about Tudor-era women fighting for better marriages and higher positions and more power… even the chance to be queen. But when they get to be queen, they’re still not happy: they know they’re not the king.
We Christian women are the queens of our households, and we love it—but we know we’re not the kings. Although our homes are our dominions, the Bible clearly says that our husbands are the leaders of them.
It’s a challenge to be in charge of the home and yet not be the leader of the family. (Even if you’re feeling skeptical here, please keep reading… it will be worth it.)